State of Mind and Patterns

Picture : Pixabay

We should try to understand patterns in our states of mind, and differentiate that with reality. The default state of mind we're usually in could be happiness, sadness, anger, chaos, stress, anxiety, fear, and things like that. I struggled with patterns a lot as well. I was extremely depressed, and I was under a constant state of stress because of my ideas, and me talking to companies, and even when I wasn't doing those things, my mind tried bringing those states of mind to my current scenario. My mind doesn't neccessarily like change, so even though I don't like being in stressful situations, my mind was made to be in one. It looked to be in these states tbh. Because although being in stressful situations wasn't comfortable, being in the same state as I have been for a year or two was home to my brain, if that makes sense. So it would react to things, increase anxiety and stress, and that would affect me a lot.

I knew my mind was doing this, but like, reaching the point where I am here is done step by step, you know? I saw a video about patterns a few weeks ago that kind of put into words what I had been thinking, and was also dealing with. It did help. This one.

Our minds have defensive mechanisms, and they either react from a past experience, or speculate, and sometimes, it is correct in thinking somethings, and sometimes, it isn't. It might feel like change is bad, so it might tend to create situations, or connect things. Our minds might not like something, some things in our past might have been uncomfortable to us, and they might think it'll happen again. They react, and they send a negative vibe at us, but in reality, it might be disliking a certain situation, or an uncomfortable situation, or just a scary situation. Sometimes, our minds are scared of things that we shouldn't be scared of, and if we explain to it that there's nothing to be scared of by facing it, it understands. It goes "Ohh, Hmm."

As for negative feelings, we should understand why we feel what we feel, and also remember that the past is the past, and that what's happening right now is not the past. That these are two different scenarios. Sometimes, knowing this along is enough. Sometimes, we need to ask ourselves questions, and understand why our brains are linking things, why we feel how we feel. Sometimes, if we slow down, and process things, we go "Oh!" If it reacts, and our brain tries to process the information too fast, it's like rolling pasta, if we roll it too fast, it might tear, you know? :P

Don't try to control your mind, let it be itself, establish your truths, establish your acceptance of yourself, of the universe, and understand that the mind links things it processes just like a puzzle, and if our conscience and our sub conscience mind are on the same page, we wouldn't have triggers or have reactions to things or patterns. There's also a void that gets created when you try to avoid things. It's exactly like you trying to not think about something. Cause you will. If something makes you uncomfortable, if one's mind goes, "This is a nice moment, hope nothing makes it not nice." The mind looks for something to not think about, and you think about it, as there's a void, and it's literally vacuum, so what one would want to not think about is thought about. It's important to let our minds be free, and feel what we feel, and accept what we feel. The way to not react is by understanding the reactions, and making it not affect you anymore. If it doesn't, it'll be a waste of thought, and the brain wouldn't do it. Our minds are trying to protect us, but if we don't understand what we feel, and just go with what our minds want us to do, and go with it's fears and compulsions, in the later stages, our minds would be like that of animals, particularly a cat. We shouldn't try to look to feel safe based on the flow of thoughts, we shouldn't live reacting to things without logic, you know?

Cats are amazing btw! I've been understanding the minds of humans, cats, and dogs, and I've realized that cats are in the moment creatures. If they zone in on something, that's what they're focused on. If you show them the palm of your hand, they focus in on the hand, and forget about the hand being a part of your body. Some attack just for fun, and they keep it in their memory. If you show them the back of your hand, they don't react as much. They might sniff it, and even lick it, or rub their face on your hand. But the palm, it might seem like a threat, and they react, and they zone in to get into that state of mind. This lets them go toe to toe with snakes and alligators even. Their understanding of physics and conservation of energy and momentum is insane! We could learn a thing or two about how to live life from cats. My friend once said "Cat life is best life." They know how to live in the moment, and also chill when they need to! I follow tons of kittens and puppies on Insta! Dogs are like children! Tbh, humans are children as well. Everyone's learning and growing at their own pace! :)

So reacting because of memories, we need to understand that the past was the past, and understand that we're here now. Just because one person betrayed you in the past doesn't mean you shouldn't be vulnerable around your friends, it doesn't mean you shouldn't trust your friends, or give them the benefit of the doubt. One person whom I considered a friend tried scamming me, and I gave them the benefit of the doubt till I found out. This did affect me for a while till I realized that what happened was the universe showing his true colors to me, and I was extremely happy that it happened. Friendship and loyalty are extremely important to me, and I'm always okay with seeing a person's true colors, you know? People that don't deserve my loyalty will not get it, and people that do will! Right now, I will say that I am everyone's friend, but that doesn't mean I consider everyone my friend.

Anyway, back to the topic, how we felt once about others should not affect how we see another interaction right now. Good or bad. I've said this before in my blog. Even if every single person in this world except one stranger treats me badly, when I meet the last one, I wouldn't look at that person like I see the others, because the actions of others towards me have nothing to do with what kind of a person they are. Even if everyone treated me well, I shouldn't expect this person to be like everyone as well. If they are, they are. If they aren't, they aren't. I want people to be themselves.

There are compulsions and reactions based on fear and safety, and people with OCD tend to face this. These are reactions our minds tend to create, and if one executes the tasks, that dispels the uneasiness one feels if it is left alone. Our minds tend to want to do things to make us feel safe. But we need to question why we do what we do, and go by logic. There's this water can in my house, and it has a sticker on it, and if the sticker is not centered with respect to the water cooler, my mind notices it, it's one extra thought to my brain, and my brain is lazy, so I make it face centrally so when I look at it the next time, it's fine, but tbh, it doesn't matter where it's facing, you know? Washing hands a certain way could come under this. Our minds auto pilot, and we do things we don't need to do. I've heard people checking locks on their doors a certain number of times, that comes under this. I think we should ask ourselves why we do what we do, and some might have logical reasons behind them. Like my water can reasoning :P It seems silly, but if I have to look at it 10 times, spending energy to realign it once isn't that big of a deal :P I used to do it :P I don't mind now, but I still like my things a certain way, you know? :P

We need to understand that we are safe or we're okay based on logic, and we shouldn't do things based on reactionary dopamine. I'm one of the laziest people on Earth, if my mind understands that something isn't logical with respect to the tasks I do, it understands. But it's about realizing it, you know? Like washing my hands a certain way. How it starts is covering the entire hand, which is logical, and then if we think about something, and our mind wanders, the mind remembers how it felt when you washed it earlier, and sends impulses to repeat them. It has to do with memory, and dopamine. What we need to do is to not auto pilot. When I was watching The Mentalist, I wanted to create a memory palace, and I read that the way to do it was linking objects with specific things you already have in mind. So linking two specific things will help one remember stuff. But this is just kind of overcomplicating things ;P Just tell yourself that you locked the doors or something, cause if we do something so much, it becomes muscle memory, and we don't need to think as much when we do something! :) I think a lot, so when I go to do tasks that are simple, my mind wanders, so sometimes, I forget if I did something or not. Like checking the locks before going to bed. So saying things like "Check" help, but it's important that saying check doesn't become a pattern as well :P Switch it up! :P Reminding ourselves that we're in this moment helps us out, you know? :)

I talked about fear in a few of my posts on Instagram, I think this will make a certain post make more sense. There are tags that people have, and it's important to not assume the tag is the one with the trait, and not the person. Good or bad. Tags are the color of one's skin, the community they're in, or their gender, their wealth, whatever. These things tell you nothing about the person. Circumstances don't make people, they reveal them. Reactions tend to find patterns, and perhaps if one thinks about things on a deeper level, one might get out of this chain of thought! Itachi says "People fear and hate things they don't understand." One should be cautious around the ones that they don't know, but one shouldn't react aggressively to what one doesn't understand! If one feels unsafe around another because they are different, their mind might send them negative signals as it's trying to keep itself safe, and if one asks oneself questions on what they did to make them feel unsafe, and things like that, if the answer isn't credible, the mind will understand. If one hisses at another because they are different, that's what cats do. Cats hiss at babies sometimes. They learn that the other isn't a threat after a while though. They purr and cuddle with them later. One shouldn't make judgements without knowing anything about the other! :)

I talked about this in one of my posts. I've realized that the negative stuff one thinks, it might be thoughts that have been misunderstood as one's subconscious doesn't know how to vocalize properly, so it connects words, and sometimes, our processing side of the brain perceives it in a wrong way. Some of the people I help on Reddit on r/MentalHealth talk about them feeling like they might be seeking attention, but actually, that's how their brain sees it. They need help, they want to ask for it to bring attention to the issues because they need it. What one wants is attention for the issue. But the subconscious might react like this : Depression Help Want Attention, and they might feel like they're doing this for attention, when they're just trying to get help. If one dwells deeper, and understands the mini links to each word, it'll become clearer. When one analyses their thoughts, and links everything properly, they understand! Sometimes, our minds also have questions, if we dwell deeper, it finds the answers it is looking for as well. "Am I doing this for attention cause it seems like it?" When one asks oneself questions, and answers them honestly, your mind will understand better!

So perhaps when one encounters another, if the feeling that one feels is negative, they might perceive it as them disliking them, but if one processes that information, they'd understand that they might have felt unsafe, or it might be a trigger memory from a past trauma, and if one asks oneself questions, they'd understand that these two situations are different, so all they needed to do was understand what their brain was telling them, and making their brain understand the situation.

I only use the term dislike, because hate is something that is baseless. There's no justification for hate. It has no proper reasoning, one is just hurting oneself by feeling hatred. There are thoughts and emotions that have bases, like love, and the foundation of love is friendship. For hatred, there is no base, it is baseless. People need to try to connect to themselves, and connect to others to understand how they feel. One realizes that there's no justification for feeling hate, and it's just shackling them. Hate destroys! Love heals!

What we feel now is how we feel now, and we need to look at it that way! Our memories help us understand how things were. Good or bad. Our imagination might tell us how we might feel, good or bad. How we feel now should be how we feel now, and it shouldn't necessarily be affected by the past, or from our imagination. We need to understand that what's meant to happen will happen, and that people are going to be who they are, and we should just be ourselves! Accepting people, and accepting the universe helps one achieve a peaceful state of mind! We should always be ourselves!

I had been working on a lot of things like depression, reactions, and things like that along the way, and the universe has been helping me a lot! I am extremely grateful for how much it loves me! :)

I don't know how many people resonate with this post, even if it did help one person with something, it was worth the effort to type this! :)

Listen to your mind, connect to it! :) Understand why you feel what you feel! :) Always be yourself! :) Take care! :)

- Dakshina (We post on love, life, and mental health on Twitter and Instagram)